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Discuss Hi everyone - bit scared.. in Welcome on Rear Party; Hi everyone, nice to meet you all! My boyfriend is deploying to Afghan in September. So far I've just kind of put it out my mind but the last few weeks I've started to really ...
  
  1. #1
    Senior Member _pj_'s Avatar
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    Hi everyone - bit scared..

    Hi everyone, nice to meet you all!

    My boyfriend is deploying to Afghan in September. So far I've just kind of put it out my mind but the last few weeks I've started to really worry.
    Anyone got any advice on how much to talk to him about it? I know he feels a bit bad about going away and leaving me so don't want to pile it on too much...
    I thought it would be good to get involved with a site like this one so that I can rant with you guys when things get tough instead of unfairly having a go at him!

    Thaanks xxx

  2. #2
    Senior Member Thebabysmum's Avatar
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    Well don't worry now September is ages away just enjoy today. Hello.

  3. #3
    Senior Member draegora's Avatar
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    I remember the crushing feeling I felt when he mentioned deployment the first time... Fact is, he went, he came back, and he will go again... The other day he asked me, do I mind that he's so dead keen to get back out there again? I said, hell no, I married a soldier not a pencil-sharpener, and he wouldn't be the man he is if he didn't have this in his blood. My advice is, don't run ahead of yourself, and take every day as it comes. September is a long way off yet, and you don't want to waste precious months of living worrying about something that may never happen. And keep coming back here - you'll find the support you need. Welcome to RP, and pass the wine
    Feisty one likes this.
    Sarchasm (sär'kăz'əm)
    1. (n.) The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.

  4. #4
    Senior Member Thebabysmum's Avatar
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    What she said,I'm waiting for him to tell me he's off to afghan,but he's not long back so it will be awhile yet. Plus,anything can happen to anyone at anytime,anywhere. Gotta enjoy the days you have! Mmmm wine!

  5. #5
    Senior Member Feisty one's Avatar
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    Hi and welcome...

    Mines a white wine - that's the important bit over with.

    Been through my (not OH's) first deployment and it wasn't as bad as I thought it would be, initially the weekends were the worst, but once I was in the flow of things it was easier than I expected.

    So, I'd echo what the others have said, it's May, don't worry the months away... ask him if it's ok to talk about it, get some answers and then leave it, because from my experience, with 2-3 weeks to go, I got all the answers I wanted about contact etc and as Draegora said, he wouldn't be the man you met if it wasn't in his blood.

    You can't change the fact he's going, so here's where I quote a song

    "Don’t worry about the future; or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubblegum"

    Enjoy today and the wealth of knowledge on here helped me a lot.
    Last edited by Feisty one; 10-05-2012 at 16:52.
    Nothing to see here, move on by....

  6. #6
    Senior Member _pj_'s Avatar
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    thanks guys, thats a great quote feisty one! i'll keep that in mind when i get frustrated with it all!
    there's a reason i fell for him in the first place..
    It will be great to come here for a bit of support and a chat.

    first round's on me girls xxx

  7. #7
    Senior Member lawlady's Avatar
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    Hello pj. Welcome. You'll be glad you found us x


    Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
    When the going gets tough - drink wine!!

  8. #8
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    Hi pj - welcome from another RP newbie.

    Is that bottle working its way round, or do we need to open a new one x

  9. #9
    Moderator Gonzo's Avatar
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    If you have a nosey via the search button at the top (with the magnifying glass symbol next to it) you will find lots of sage advice regarding first tours, etc etc. Once you have had a nosey and have settled in a bit feel free to moan away, like us not-so-oldies do.

    Now the important bit.

    Mines a Brandy Sour, and the bar MUST be open by now.
    Carpe Diem


    "Wit is educated insolence."

  10. #10
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    My OH goes in Sept too and even though I'm dreading it, I have to put it out of my mind and as the others said, enjoy every moment of the next few months because you will naturally worry in the run up to him going and when he has gone, so wasting all that energy on worrying now won't help.

    Its a great source of support and info on here. Welcome.

    I'll have a vodka redbull please, feeling a bit sluggish today.

  11. #11
    Senior Member draegora's Avatar
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    Can we move on from the wine and bring on the fishbowl now? Straws are optional - I'm so happy right now I could just dive in
    Sarchasm (sär'kăz'əm)
    1. (n.) The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.

  12. #12
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    Mine is off in March - slightly worried about it but I knew when I got with him this would happen and totally agree with Draegora, he is a soldier and its part of the package deal that comes along with excessive farting and eating more than 4 normal men can.
    Im giving it all the biggen now but come March and im sure you'll all be giving me all 'pull yourself together' slaps whilst I pour my heart out on here :P x

  13. #13
    Senior Member Thebabysmum's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by draegora View Post
    Can we move on from the wine and bring on the fishbowl now? Straws are optional - I'm so happy right now I could just dive in
    Want!! You've got me in the mood for cocktails it's almost Friday! I'm sure mine probably knows when he will be headed out there next but just doesn't want to tell me yet and I'm not gonna ask. Pour your heart out that's what it's here for anyway,but yea they eat so much,delivery man might aswell just move in when he's back.

  14. #14
    Senior Member _pj_'s Avatar
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    haa! i've never known anyone eat so much.. so funny that its a trait that they share

    mm cocktails sounds like a great idea.. make mine a mojiiito xx

  15. #15
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    Hi, welcome

    MMmmmm I'll have a Mojiito too please I've not experienced deployment yet, but everyone on here is lovely and i'm sure they'll be full of good advice for you xx

  16. #16
    Senior Member Special_Tree's Avatar
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    I wish you'd told me solving algebra problems by chewing bubblegum wouldn't work years ago! I spent most of my maths GCSE young just that!!!


    Welcome to RP. My take on your question is always that the anticipation is harder than the doing!!

    I'll have a summery cocktail please so I can pretend the weather isn't as shit as it actually is!!

    Sent from my BlackBerry 9860 using Tapatalk
    "Never say never, because limits, like fears, are often just an illusion"

  17. #17
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    I'll have an orgasm please... September? that's yonks away.... nothing is ever definate in the army until 12 hours before, and even then you mark it on your calender in pencil. Dates change, jobs change, the world changes.... so we have some time to err.... sort your head out for you before then... welcome to the mad house.....I'm not working anymore, so I can have a drink or two, three, four.. just pass the fishbowl and a straw...
    scottishlassie likes this.
    Chaos, panic, disorder, my work here is done!

  18. #18
    Moderator bodger's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by scottishlassie View Post
    but everyone on here is lovely . . .
    'Scuse me! I'm not. Neither is Padders, she's a cow (allegedly).

  19. #19
    Senior Member lawlady's Avatar
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    You two are pussyctas ..... whatever happened to Lynxie and Bossy???????????????
    When the going gets tough - drink wine!!

  20. #20
    Moderator bodger's Avatar
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    I'm not sure, but if we're talking 'lovely' Ming Mong would be top of the list, obviously.

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