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Discuss Newbie, would really appreciate support and advice :) in Welcome on Rear Party; Hello everyone, newbie here! My boyfriend leaves for basic training in the coming months at Catterick. We have been together five months and I am very dedicated to our relationship. I am very anxious but ...
  
  1. #1
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    Newbie, would really appreciate support and advice :)

    Hello everyone, newbie here!
    My boyfriend leaves for basic training in the coming months at Catterick.
    We have been together five months and I am very dedicated to our relationship.
    I am very anxious but see it what a great opportunity it is for him and his future, and hopefully it will make our relationship stronger.
    Please could someone give me an insight into what to expect?
    How often we can talk, see each other etc.
    I want to be as prepared as possible!
    Thank you

  2. #2
    Senior Member squirrel_pigeon's Avatar
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    Hi and welcome to RP

    My OH is Navy so can't tell you anything about basic for the Army but someone will be along soon to let you know about that.

    White wine tonight if you're buying please!

    Sent from my GT-S5830 using Tapatalk 2
    "You don't think there's anything amiss? I'm sitting here wearing a red and white checked gingham dress and army boots and you think that's un-amiss?"

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    I am so glad I have found this website!
    I have no one to relate to or even ask for advice so this is very reasurring
    thank you

  4. #4
    Senior Member lawlady's Avatar
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    Welcome. He'll get very wrapped up in what he's doing. When he does contact you it'll all he about him! Normal behaviour so don't worry.
    From now on write stuff in pencil and lean on us - we do understand xx


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    Heli likes this.
    When the going gets tough - drink wine!!

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    He has done some training before so I guess he knows what to expect, which is a good start!
    Thank you, I will take this all on board Thats what he said to me, everything can suddenly change. xx

  6. #6
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    Welcome to the madhouse Missy May! Mine's a very large, and I do mean very large, Martini and Lemonade,if you're buying.

  7. #7
    Senior Member SarahB's Avatar
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    Hi and welcome, my OH is Navy so I can't really comment either but mine's a cider if someone's going. I'm on my last one and the shop's shut now!
    Distance is not for the fearful, it is for the bold. It's for those who are willing to spend a lot of time alone in exchange for a little time with the one they love. It's for those knowing a good thing when they see it, even if they don't see it nearly enough.

  8. #8
    Senior Member Thebabysmum's Avatar
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    Hi get me a coffee or red bull it's too early!! OH is army,don't clock watch or spend all your time waiting till you next see him again,although its nice to look forward too it and have some sort of mental countdown,spend lots of time with your mates/going out/getting nails done/whatever you do etc etc,Cus when he's back you'll prob not want to spend a moment away from him...let him know you miss him but don't make him feel like you cant live without him,and be patient. I usually get 'be in touch how and when I can' when he goes away...and I find when OH is away he goes into bloke work mode,so don't be put out if he doesn't sound his usual self if he calls you or whatever,they're just busy/tired.

  9. #9
    Senior Member Thebabysmum's Avatar
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    Ohhh. And expect dates to change,there's sometimes no point in asking when he's got time off,or making plans for certain dates. They can sometimes just change last minute,and he might not be back when you expect or turn up sooner than you think. So if your ok with not having to make plans or having your plans disrupted you'll be right.

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    Thankyou everyone for being so friendly! I dont want to sound needy already but this is exactly what I need
    Thank you on the advice how to act, I obviously am going to miss him, but its hard to know how to act about it all as I dont want him feeling guilty about making me a bit upset!
    Well, I guess I have to be okay with plans being disrupted, no other choice! xx

  11. #11
    Senior Member auntylol's Avatar
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    Basic is going to be hard for him. He's going to have good days when everything is amazing and he's buzzing, and days when he just hates everything and wants to give up and come home ( tip don't drop everything to run and get him! you'll soon know if he's in real trouble)- you'll worry yourself sick but by morning he'll have forgotten. So a shoulder to cry on and listening ear are best things to develop. Catterick is near some lovely countryside, Richmond is nice. He may become a bit self absorbed and his new mates might seem the be all and end all- they have to be to get through this together. Look forward to family days and pass out- he'll be wanting to show you of!

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    I am all for being his shoulder to cry on! I'm trying to be as supportive as I can because I know how life changing it will be for him, but I kind of feel nervous at the same time! I know he loves me but I'm worried that he wont have enough time for me anymore (like you are saying about him and his new friends). Once he moves to base we are going to be about 3 hours away from each other, I love him I'm just worried how it will be, I'm so used to seeing each other a few times a week! I know absolutely nothing about the army, so its all new to me, I dont know what to expect! Its nice that I can seek advice here, thank you I'm sure youve all had the seperation fears that I have, but have survived the bad times okay, just hope I can do the same xx

  13. #13
    Senior Member YellowRose's Avatar
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    Hi and welcome my OH is navy and is passing out next Friday ! I don't know about army basic training but for me it hasn't been as bad as I expected! I kept really busy and focused on work and friends didn't even manage to get done all the things I had planned ! I think the hardest was not being able to ring him when I needed to but I got used to it! He txts me in the evening and I've had a few calls but not many as they keep them busy in the evenings too ! When I do hear from him its all about what he's doing which I understand and I'm here to support him in the ups and downs! I put everything I don't get chance to say in a letter! Don't worry about the separation we've become even closer and feel stronger than ever through this experience! Good luck and go with the flow!

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    Hello Aww, really thats exciting!
    Its reassuring to know that you havent found it that bad!
    I think its going to be a shock at first as we talk constantly :/
    I dont mind hearing all about him, as long as we get to talk I guess.
    Thank you, I know I'm probably being silly worrying, so many people go through it and are fine!
    I hope we become stronger like you have
    Thank you very much xx

  15. #15
    Senior Member YellowRose's Avatar
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    I'm really excited and a bit nervous now! I think I've finally decided what to wear ! Its natural to be worried it's all new and you don't know what to expect. You've come to the right place for advice and support from people who have been there and understand it's helped me !

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    Where is he doing his training at and what have you decided to wear?
    Mine will be passing out in late november, going to be freezing!
    Yes, I guess it would be unatural not to worry about change
    Aww, Im so glad I stumbled across this, I hope in the future I can repay the favour help others then

  17. #17
    Senior Member SarahB's Avatar
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    All the worrying, missing them and separation is so worth it when you check the calendar and suddenly you're into single figures till you see them! Then comes the mass panic to undo the months of not waxing and shaving your legs and the excitement - it's honestly better than Christmas when you were a kid! My OH had a December pass out, two pieces of advice, you will be outside standing up for a very very long time so wear a good coat, take an umbrella (a black one if you can) and very sensible shoes. I thought my shoes were comfortable but after 4 hours of nonstop standing I was pretty much crippled and then had to wear high heels the next day for the ball. Ow. Luckily I have a very good poker face Yellowrose is your OHs passing out parade at BRNC?
    Distance is not for the fearful, it is for the bold. It's for those who are willing to spend a lot of time alone in exchange for a little time with the one they love. It's for those knowing a good thing when they see it, even if they don't see it nearly enough.

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    Ahh, I cannot wait to be into single figures! I know I'm going to get butterflies and everything, I think its good that we get to experiance this feeling over again and again, where as other people dont! Thank you, you've really made me realise that it isnt going to be the end, that it isnt worth getting worked up over it
    Haha, and you for the passing out advice too! knowing me I would have been clueless and chosen the most impractical shoes!x

  19. #19
    Senior Member YellowRose's Avatar
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    He's has Been training at raleigh so thats where the passing out parade is on Friday! I'm feeling all sorts of emotions right now and it's is defiantly more exciting than Christmas as a kid ! I originally got a very floaty summery dress but as the weather is set to be nasty I've had to rethink and I've gone for a 50s Style halter neck that I can wear black tights, cardigan and jacket with and comfy shoes with a tiny heel. It's going to be nice to see where he's been training and finally see him in his uniform

  20. #20
    Moderator Army Families Federation's Avatar
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    Welcome to RP MissyMay! Plenty of wise words to be found here for just about every situation life can throw at you, it's a great place

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