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Discuss NewGuy joining the rear party ranks :-) in Welcome on Rear Party; Hello All I have been reading a lot of your posts the majority seem exceptionally supportive. My GF has just started Sandhurst we have been together for a year and i can safely say she ...
  
  1. #1
    Junior Member Crew's Avatar
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    NewGuy joining the rear party ranks :-)

    Hello All

    I have been reading a lot of your posts the majority seem exceptionally supportive.

    My GF has just started Sandhurst we have been together for a year and i can safely say she is the one for me, i love her to bits. Im not used to being apart from her and am struggling to deal with the fact that my weeks are empty now where as they used to be full of fun things that we would do together.

    I speak to her everynight trying to be as supportive as i can whilst shes struggling through her training. The only problem is im feeling pretty down i quess im Pineing for her. I dont really have anyone to talk to about how feel or any good ways of dealing with it. Im not very good at putting on brave faces. Im worried that she may detect that im feeling low, Im really trying to be strong for her & i dont want her to loose focus on what shes doing because she worries about me.

    I have a helpless feeling inside, & generally feeling very restless i train everynight just to try and tire myself out and to take my mind off the obvious i.e. struggling to emotionally deal with the new format of our relationship.

    Whats worse is that im off round to her parents to take her Dad for a run and have dinner but i dont want them to pick up on the way feel because im sure they are in the same boat emotionally as i am.

    Im not really sure what i am asking for here, maybe some advice or a shoulder to cry on so to speak.

    C
    xx

  2. #2
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    Re: NewGuy joining the rear party ranks :-)

    Hi there C

    Welcome to the site, I'm sure there are lots of peeps on here that will be glad to give you some advice or encouragement......

    Anyway, chin up and if you need someone's ear to bend there's plenty of us on here...

  3. #3
    Senior Member GM_1000's Avatar
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    Re: NewGuy joining the rear party ranks :-)

    Welcome to RP - lots of us are missing people we love at the mo, so you're amomgst friends. The best advice I've been given is just to keep busy and remember your OH is doing what they love (said goodbye to my boyfriend this morning - he flies out to the sand pit on Saturday). Are you sure you can't talk to her parents? If you're looking for people who'll understand your situation it seems like they'd be ideal.

    Enjoy the website,
    GM.

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    Re: NewGuy joining the rear party ranks :-)

    Hello, Al lot of us on here are on our own for a while for one reason or another. Its really good that you are into fitness and have that to take your mind off everything.
    If her parents are feeling the same then it will probably do you all good to talk about it, theres nothing wrong with showing them how much you care about their daughter.

    I am sure there are plenty of ladies on here who will take you under their wing.

    MrsB

  5. #5
    Senior Member lawlady's Avatar
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    Re: NewGuy joining the rear party ranks :-)

    Hey crew welcome. Loads of us in the same boat, and those who aren't at the minute have been. keep busy, talk to her folks and pull up a chair, crack a beer here and chat away xx
    Rank: Biddy 1st Class

    When the going gets tough - drink wine!!

  6. #6
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    Re: NewGuy joining the rear party ranks :-)

    Quote Originally Posted by MrsB
    Hello, Al lot of us on here are on our own for a while for one reason or another. Its really good that you are into fitness and have that to take your mind off everything.
    If her parents are feeling the same then it will probably do you all good to talk about it, theres nothing wrong with showing them how much you care about their daughter.

    I am sure there are plenty of ladies on here who will take you under their wing.

    MrsB
    What she said (god i'm lazy tonight)

    Feel free to join in though, whether it's just getting things off your chest or something else there's almost always someone around

  7. #7
    Member tanya's Avatar
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    Re: NewGuy joining the rear party ranks :-)

    Quote Originally Posted by Crew
    Hello All

    I have been reading a lot of your posts the majority seem exceptionally supportive.

    My GF has just started Sandhurst we have been together for a year and i can safely say she is the one for me, i love her to bits. Im not used to being apart from her and am struggling to deal with the fact that my weeks are empty now where as they used to be full of fun things that we would do together.

    I speak to her everynight trying to be as supportive as i can whilst shes struggling through her training. The only problem is im feeling pretty down i quess im Pineing for her. I dont really have anyone to talk to about how feel or any good ways of dealing with it. Im not very good at putting on brave faces. Im worried that she may detect that im feeling low, Im really trying to be strong for her & i dont want her to loose focus on what shes doing because she worries about me.

    I have a helpless feeling inside, & generally feeling very restless i train everynight just to try and tire myself out and to take my mind off the obvious i.e. struggling to emotionally deal with the new format of our relationship.

    Whats worse is that im off round to her parents to take her Dad for a run and have dinner but i dont want them to pick up on the way feel because im sure they are in the same boat emotionally as i am.

    Im not really sure what i am asking for here, maybe some advice or a shoulder to cry on so to speak.

    C
    xx
    Heya...
    Im kinda in the same situation as you, my fiance is in the navy and although he is not at sea at the moment I still dont see him very much (some weekends if I am lucky)......I am getting really down at the moment, to make matters worse I am living with his parents!!!!!!!!!!!!
    I have tried putting on a brave face and pretending to be happy, but I am fed up of doing that....I am not at all happy, its very difficult. Its good to have sites like this to talk to others in similar/the same situation.
    My mates dont really understand, they all have their boyfriends and girlfriends living with them.
    Anyways....
    Bye 4 now....
    Tan x

  8. #8
    Senior Member honeybaby's Avatar
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    Re: NewGuy joining the rear party ranks :-)

    hey crew, howdy. look, the way you're feeling is natural, take it easy. unbelievable it may seem but you will get used to it, even understand and appreciate it.....i hated it believe me. it's ok to miss her...she's no doubt missing you too. at the moment she's a little fish in a big sea....don't forget to tell her you miss her, i think she does need to know....just let her know you're happy she's got her dream too. she still needs you to be her man, even if she'll soon be able to batter you haha. it's come across loud and clear you love her deeply and are a sensitive guy. that's fantastic, don't think you need to change. keep smilin

  9. #9
    Senior Member Gillylady's Avatar
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    Re: NewGuy joining the rear party ranks :-)

    Welcome Crew, you are not alone

    x
    Working.........bane of the drinking woman's life

  10. #10
    Senior Member lawlady's Avatar
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    Re: NewGuy joining the rear party ranks :-)

    Bazzer will love it - another male
    Rank: Biddy 1st Class

    When the going gets tough - drink wine!!

  11. #11
    Senior Member Fally_Fox's Avatar
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    Re: NewGuy joining the rear party ranks :-)

    Hiya and welcome to RP!

    Your lady is a very lucky lass to have a fella like you. Most of us on here understand what you are going through and it aint bloody easy! Have a nosey around the threads and you'll find loads of advice on easing the worry and heartache, and also post and chat away coz that helps loads too

  12. #12
    Senior Member tattooedlady's Avatar
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    Re: NewGuy joining the rear party ranks :-)

    Quote Originally Posted by MrsB
    Hello, Al lot of us on here are on our own for a while for one reason or another. Its really good that you are into fitness and have that to take your mind off everything.
    If her parents are feeling the same then it will probably do you all good to talk about it, theres nothing wrong with showing them how much you care about their daughter.

    I am sure there are plenty of ladies on here who will take you under their wing.

    MrsB
    Are we all mother hens???

    Anyway on a serious note, good for you to know what you want and well done to your gf for going to Sandhurst. We're here for whatever, be interesting to have a guy's view on the whole thing as most of us are the opposite way round to you.

    Any questions there will always be someone around to answer them.
    Em x


  13. #13
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    Re: NewGuy joining the rear party ranks :-)

    Hello and welcome - the ladies will look after you and get you through it.

  14. #14
    Senior Member GM_1000's Avatar
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    Re: NewGuy joining the rear party ranks :-)

    P_C: amazed you're able to write and not chained to the bed! Hope you're enjoying having your guy back

  15. #15
    Senior Member Bazzer's Avatar
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    Re: NewGuy joining the rear party ranks :-)

    Too right Ploddy. We are expanding, we gain in strength, we will multiply in numbers, we will take over and rule, we will exterminate.


    Oooooo, I came over all funny. Dark room and a lay down.

    Oh yes. I forgot, watcha mate, welcome aboard and welcome to the male sub-section ie. Albert, you and moi. They are a great bunch of honourary geezers. A better mob would be hard to find

    Enjoy
    The Old Git sitting at the bar on his own. Moaning

    Eat shit. 5 million flies can't be wrong.

    Danger. Do NOT Feed the Bazzers

  16. #16
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    Re: NewGuy joining the rear party ranks :-)

    Welcome to RP crew!
    hope you enjoy the site!

  17. #17
    Senior Member Magic_Jeenyus's Avatar
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    Re: NewGuy joining the rear party ranks :-)

    hey there crew welcome to RP its a GREAT site! im sure you will find all the help and advise you need here x
    Love is a burning thing...and it makes a firey ring....bound by wild desires....i fell into a ring of fire...

  18. #18
    Junior Member Crew's Avatar
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    Re: NewGuy joining the rear party ranks :-)

    WoW

    I wasn't expecting such caring responses. Thank you so much You guys really put a smile on my face, Its fantastic to know that im not alone.

    I took her dad for a good beasting lastnite shortly after bursting into tears when her mother answered the door We had a delicous meal and it was good to talk to them. They are both missing their daughter hugely in a parental way, which i imagine is similar to how i feel apart from my baby will always be their daughter.

    I have a massive amount of respect for you guys. You are so strong for dealing with the emotional turmoil that im just beginning to encounter & we've only been apart for 6 weeks.

    Insight INto The Male Mind (Minus the bravado im just not afraid to express my feelings)

    For me right now its difficult i feel constantly choked and never far from tears. The mornings and just before bedtime is when its at its worst, sobbing in our bed and crying in the shower, shaving ones face is very difficult when your blinded by tears The last time i felt like this was when i split from my fiance after she cheated on me whilst on her police recruit training. I dont think that is affecting this though as i completely trust my OH and totaly believe in her.

    I suppose it may be the fact that i no longer have an equal share in our relationship. The army now controls the terms & conditions of what ever we do together, I feel a bit left out. I do feel some resentment, which i keep well & truely hidden, is that a normal feeling? I certainly feel quilty for feeling it.

    Im also exceptionally jealous as she is doing something that i would love to do but unfortunately im to old for the army now, but not the other services however that would really mean curtains for our relationship so i have put that to oneside. In my life i have come to realise that being in love and loved is far more important than any career.

    I write to my baby every day trying to keep her strong, and i fill my letters and conversations with reassurances for her to keep her feeling loved and complete

    Well ladies this is what its like in the mind of a male who is struggling to deal with his loving relationship being Armyfied. I assume its fairly similar to the female experience.

    Thank you for your support you are all amazing, im smiling again now

    C
    xx

  19. #19
    Senior Member tattooedlady's Avatar
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    Re: NewGuy joining the rear party ranks :-)

    Hellooooooo again,

    You say you'd love to do what she's doing but can't due to your age, just curious, how old are you?

    Em x


  20. #20
    Junior Member Crew's Avatar
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    Re: NewGuy joining the rear party ranks :-)

    Quote Originally Posted by tattooedlady
    Hellooooooo again,

    You say you'd love to do what she's doing but can't due to your age, just curious, how old are you?

    Em x
    Hey There Em

    Im the ripe old age of 29 rolling on 30 next march

    C
    xx

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