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Discuss new to all this!!!! in Welcome on Rear Party; hello all!!! ive been an army wife for 5 years now - living in tidworth atm - finding it increasingly difficult to meet anyone one the same wave length as myself!!! the wives i have ...
  
  1. #1
    Junior Member gingersweep's Avatar
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    new to all this!!!!

    hello all!!!

    ive been an army wife for 5 years now - living in tidworth atm - finding it increasingly difficult to meet anyone one the same wave length as myself!!!

    the wives i have met either 1) try and flirt with my hubby or 2) drop me as soon as their husbands return!!!

    its increasingly frustrating as both OH and i make such as effort with others regardless as to whether or not he's at home!!

    thought i would give this a bash as, it must be said and felt by you all, army life can get increasingly lonely at times!!! and the OH is no substitute for friendship of good ol' women pals!!!

    xx

  2. #2
    Senior Member choc-chip-cookie's Avatar
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    Re: new to all this!!!!

    hello and welcome to RP. I'm a bit too far away from tidders and can't drink at the moment but i'm sure if you crack open a bottle of something, you'll find some willing takers on here!
    choc-chip cookie x

    Some people are like slinkies, they're really good for nothing...but they still bring a smile to your face when you push them down a flight of stairs!

  3. #3
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    Re: new to all this!!!!

    the wives i have met either 1) try and flirt with my hubby or 2) drop me as soon as their husbands return!!!
    Nice!
    Welcome to RP.

  4. #4
    Senior Member bootifull's Avatar
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    Re: new to all this!!!!

    Bajesus a wifey for 5 yrs and still made no pals????
    Are you sure the "other women" are flirting with your husband?


    I loved Tidders....would return in a heartbeat.
    Mimi: "I'm a fat f*ck. I'm a f*cking fat f*cker".

  5. #5
    Junior Member Ladyhawk's Avatar
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    Re: new to all this!!!!

    Hi Gingersweep,

    welcome!
    I totally agree with you! A little more social cohesion should make life much easier, especially army life. It's hard being alone when your OH's somewhere around the world and no one cares.
    Everybody complains about and suffers from loneliness, but nobody changes it.
    Where are you? Feel free to send me a PM, if you like.
    And I hope a lot more ladies here in this forum will offer you some support.


  6. #6
    Junior Member gingersweep's Avatar
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    Re: new to all this!!!!

    tell me about it!!!!

    since my hubby was promoted - and since i started workin, i found a lot a 'negitivity' from some of my friends...........'my husband deserves that promotion more than yours' etc etc - i find it quite hard to deal with at times. surely, who cares about rank?!!!! all that matters is to be proud of whatever and whoever achieves anything at all??!!

    my husband did 4 tours in 4 years - i was running around doing favours for everyone - bqqs to get us all together! for example, my friends hubby came back from iraq 2 months ago - ive not seen her since!!

    x

  7. #7
    Moderator bodger's Avatar
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    Re: new to all this!!!!

    I'm with boots on this one. 5 years and no friends? I've never been anywhere and not made some sort of friend by the end of the 2nd day. Get yourself out and about a bit more. Or change your mates. I've honestly in all my 15 years or so, never felt as though anyone has flirted with my OH or dumped me as soon as their bloke tips back up (maybe I'm incredibly dim though). And if someone pulls the rank thing on you just smile sweetly at them and feign indifference.

    As for more 'social cohesion'. . . I find it hard to believe that it would be any better in civvy street. Maybe it's a personality thing???

  8. #8
    Moderator bodger's Avatar
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    Re: new to all this!!!!

    Sorry, forgot to say 'welcome gingersweep'!!

  9. #9
    Junior Member gingersweep's Avatar
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    Re: new to all this!!!!

    im not saying i dont have any friends at all - im just saying that it would be nice to make more.

    as for the personnalitly thing? i have plenty of friends back home.

    maybe this was a bad idea

  10. #10
    Junior Member gingersweep's Avatar
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    Re: new to all this!!!!

    i would also like to point out that as a regt, we dont move anywhere and very few of our regt are married. the people living around us move frequently - so and friends i do make move on fairly quickly

  11. #11
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    Re: new to all this!!!!

    Quote Originally Posted by gingersweep
    im not saying i dont have any friends at all - im just saying that it would be nice to make more.

    as for the personnalitly thing? i have plenty of friends back home.

    maybe this was a bad idea
    Dont be silly!
    Stick around and get stuck in.... I think there are a couple from your neck of the woods. Get the kettle on and pull up a chair. Unless you're like CK who will be on her third 'Hair of the Dog' this morning!!

  12. #12
    Junior Member Ladyhawk's Avatar
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    Re: new to all this!!!!

    Please, military life is strange and not everyone gets along with all this, you all now what I am talking about. Everything changes very quickly and not every wife deals with the long time OH's on his mission.
    And I really have a guess that something has changed in the community. I've been a military wife since I was 19 and there was a lot of support between the wives at that time. And you all know, it depends on where you are living, some comunities are easier to get in and some are more stiff. I had to live on Air bases where I was friends with nearly everyone from the very first second and it took weeks on other bases to achieve an invitation for a tea party...
    When I lost my last military OH in Iraq suddenly everyone dissappeared. I had the choice to be handed over to an unmarried mate like I'd be a used car, I mean 3 month after we buried what was left of my OH! As if I haven't loved him! As if ...
    Now I am living in a non-military area which is almost hostile about a "Killerbraut", that's how they talk to me here. And all the old friends, hm, sometimes I hear something, but it feels like I lost my lifeline.

    So I sit here and think about how it would be if I had agreed to get engaged with a mate of my late OH, doesn't matter if I like him or not, just to get a piece of my life back which I really miss. Don't worry, he's married now, so I lost my one-of-a-lifetime chance to experience the dhobiing of his laundry...

    In the end I can understand if someone feels uncomfortable.

    But, what SC wrote Pull up a chair and start making a good idea out of a bad feeling!

  13. #13
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    Re: new to all this!!!!

    Quote Originally Posted by Ladyhawk
    Please, military life is strange and not everyone gets along with all this, you all now what I am talking about. Everything changes very quickly and not every wife deals with the long time OH's on his mission.
    And I really have a guess that something has changed in the community. I've been a military wife since I was 19 and there was a lot of support between the wives at that time. And you all know, it depends on where you are living, some comunities are easier to get in and some are more stiff. I had to live on Air bases where I was friends with nearly everyone from the very first second and it took weeks on other bases to achieve an invitation for a tea party...
    When I lost my last military OH in Iraq suddenly everyone dissappeared. I had the choice to be handed over to an unmarried mate like I'd be a used car, I mean 3 month after we buried what was left of my OH! As if I haven't loved him! As if ...
    Now I am living in a non-military area which is almost hostile about a "Killerbraut", that's how they talk to me here. And all the old friends, hm, sometimes I hear something, but it feels like I lost my lifeline.

    So I sit here and think about how it would be if I had agreed to get engaged with a mate of my late OH, doesn't matter if I like him or not, just to get a piece of my life back which I really miss. Don't worry, he's married now, so I lost my one-of-a-lifetime chance to experience the dhobiing of his laundry...
    I understand that you have suffered a terrible loss but at the same time I am not sure that some of the contents of your post are appropriate here. It makes for uncomfortable reading on my part anyway. It might be better in a PM.

  14. #14
    Junior Member Ladyhawk's Avatar
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    Re: new to all this!!!!

    You're right I am sorry, I shouldn't have written those things.
    I apologize. I am a bit sore and edgy.

  15. #15
    Senior Member lawlady's Avatar
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    Re: new to all this!!!!

    Hello ginger, welcome to RP. We are a friendly bunch but will speak our minds. Now you've found us stick about xx
    Rank: Biddy 1st Class

    When the going gets tough - drink wine!!

  16. #16
    CK
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    Re: new to all this!!!!

    Quote Originally Posted by smartcookie
    Quote Originally Posted by gingersweep
    im not saying i dont have any friends at all - im just saying that it would be nice to make more.

    as for the personnalitly thing? i have plenty of friends back home.

    maybe this was a bad idea
    Dont be silly!
    Stick around and get stuck in.... I think there are a couple from your neck of the woods. Get the kettle on and pull up a chair. Unless you're like CK who will be on her third 'Hair of the Dog' this morning!!
    I didn't need a "hairy dog" this morning, what I needed was some sleep

    I've been most productive. Shame you're jealous of my lush-ious lifestyle

  17. #17
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    Re: new to all this!!!!

    Quote Originally Posted by CocoaKid
    Quote Originally Posted by smartcookie
    Quote Originally Posted by gingersweep
    im not saying i dont have any friends at all - im just saying that it would be nice to make more.

    as for the personnalitly thing? i have plenty of friends back home.

    maybe this was a bad idea
    Dont be silly!
    Stick around and get stuck in.... I think there are a couple from your neck of the woods. Get the kettle on and pull up a chair. Unless you're like CK who will be on her third 'Hair of the Dog' this morning!!
    I didn't need a "hairy dog" this morning, what I needed was some sleep

    I've been most productive. Shame you're jealous of my lush-ious lifestyle
    Obviously a good night

  18. #18
    Senior Member LizBiff's Avatar
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    Re: new to all this!!!!

    Quote Originally Posted by smartcookie
    Quote Originally Posted by CocoaKid
    Quote Originally Posted by smartcookie
    Quote Originally Posted by gingersweep
    im not saying i dont have any friends at all - im just saying that it would be nice to make more.

    as for the personnalitly thing? i have plenty of friends back home.

    maybe this was a bad idea
    Dont be silly!
    Stick around and get stuck in.... I think there are a couple from your neck of the woods. Get the kettle on and pull up a chair. Unless you're like CK who will be on her third 'Hair of the Dog' this morning!!
    I didn't need a "hairy dog" this morning, what I needed was some sleep

    I've been most productive. Shame you're jealous of my lush-ious lifestyle
    Obviously a good night


    CK would NEVER drink Pepsi, how very dare you!!!!

    Welcome to RP everyone who is new.

    Liz
    xx

  19. #19
    Senior Member dizzybird's Avatar
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    Re: new to all this!!!!

    Welcome and enjoy.

    Dizzy x
    Bring out the big guns! www.greenflash.org.uk

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