Thread: Newbie - First tour - rollercoaster of emotions and SO many questions!!!

Originally Posted by dizzy.chick

The most important thing to remember is to wrap all his packages in pink wrapping paper- the ones with princesses are the best He will thank you for it when he gets back- I promise

*disclaimer- I had sugar in my tea this morning so might be in a slightly comical mood and all advice should be taken with a pinch of sherbet*

It defo will pass the time for his mates :0

Hello

Just thought I'd confirm with what has already been said above, and as I am in countdown mode myself now, it is the worse time for me, the not knowing dates for leaving, the endless amount of kit being dragged from the loft, or even worse more bits from stores, to clog up the house.
It makes me a bit anxious as I just want him gone, so I can look forward to the return.

I'll have a white wine!

Thank you so much everyone!!

This forum is going to be a godsend! I'm making a list of everything I need to know, and the things I can and can't do, and stuff that he would like me to send to him ... we always send eachother random pictures of things, so I want to try to take a random picture every day, or every other day and send it to him, just keep him grounded back here really

I was supposed to be seeing him tonight, as he's off on exercise for 2 weeks, but true to form, last minute cock ups meant that he hasn't been able to get off base to come and see me (he lives on base in Tidworth while he's working, stays with me in Southampton when not). So not going to see him until the 24th now, and just when I had such good news to share and was busting to tell him, I had to tell him by text (I got a new job after a rough few weeks with a back injury from car accident and a lot of doors slamming shut in my face) ... was so fed up I just burst into tears ... but kept it totally cool for him ... and poured a BIG glass of rose once the little one was in bed ...

Sigh. x

Oh... and I am DEFINITELY doing the pink wrapping paper. Maybe even some glitter and sparkles

Hey and welcome to RP. Iv not long discovered the place myself, the OH has been away now for 5 months with 2 to go and r&r approaching yipee!! Everyone has said most things, keep busy if you can, keep up his moral by sending him all his favourite things. I like buying stuff and putting things together that I know he will love, although my Mr gets his packages and letters about every 2 months!! It keeps your mind occupied thinking of what you can do next, i sent a movie box with made up tickets, popcorn, dvd, pick and mix etc, he loved it. The yellow printed eblueys are a god send, little ray of sunshines me and my friend call them. Enjoy the lovely days you have left with each other, you will get all the details you need before he goes or whilst he is there. we will get you through it! Il have a vodka cranberry please x

ahh exercises, bessie mate had that the other week when her fella's lot went on a 3 weeker, a week earlier than planned.

sodding army huh

and i always put pink or purple tissue paper with mine and very girly things that i will be in trouble for when hes home hehe x

Hi Medic K
YOu have summed up EXACTLY how I feel. My partner is going in 4 weeks too, and my head is in bits, spent a very tearful morning untill I came across this sight but now I feel like a little weights been lifted. Just had no one to talk to about how I feel, my friends don't understand, and don't know anyone else in forces.
My partner whilst not happy about going has been several times before, so knows what to expect and he's such a lovely positive guy (one of the reasons I fell for him) that he reassures me that everything will be ok, and sees the positive in everything!!!. But I'm more of the glass half empty make up me, much to my dismay..
There i was the other day telling him how Im gonna be busy and not mope about..hA who am I trying to kid!!!
We havent even talked about the finer details of how we'll communicate when he's gone, we haven't talked about how hes gonna get to Brize when he goes, I just can't bring myself to just yet. But he finishes work next Tuesday and is off untill he goes, so we have 3 weeks of being together that I've got to cherish before he goes..
I'm here if you need me..anytime xxx

Siddneey - thank you for your reply!! I just know that it is going to be so much easier now that I've discovered this site and found you all, I can do this, I can and I will!! My man will be as proud of me as I am of him when he gets back

Josephine ... sodding army indeed, haha!!

Miss M - Oh my goodness!! Reading your post was like reading something that I had written. Our men sound very much alike, Mr. K is also very positive, reassuraing and so so comforting. Keeping completely upbeat and really doing his best to keep both of our spirits up. We both are, but we are both feeling the strain now ...

I also don't know anyone else in the forces, I don't like on camp (am about 40min away from camp - he's in Tidworth and I am in Southampton) so I have never met any other wives or girlfriends and don't get to go to any family briefings etc ... It's a very lonely, scary time when you're on your own. Well, neither of us are on our own now (((hug)))

We haven't talked about communication when he's gone or anything either, just very fleetingly. He just wants to get out there and get it over with. Which is where this site is such a godsend, because we can ask all our questions here and not have to worry the boys...

Sounds like our fellas are leaving at the same time, same deployment maybe? Mr. K is on exercise until 23rd Feb and then off for 2 and a half weeks, before back to camp the Monday before he flies out, so we will get a bit of time together too ... going to treasure every single moment with him ...

I've also not broached the subject of Brize, but I would actually like to be able to go and see him off. It will be horrendous, I'm not even going to try to kid myself, but I will regret it if I am not there to say goodbye and wave him off ... how would you feel about going with him, if they are going on the same day, and meeting up with me? That way we can hold strong until they've gone ... and then crumple in a heap!

Funny enough, I lived in Notts for a while, whereabouts are you? Also, Mr. K was based there a few years ago ...

Chin up, hunni, we will get through this!!! xxx

Medic, I'm in Southampton (but only for the next 11 days) there are plenty of wives here that will happily bitch about the army with you though!

Southampton used to be my haunt too, until the Army posted hubby.

Good luck with the move S_T

Medic, (after waving Mr B off to Brize countless times) I have one bit of advice for you . . .

I wouldn't advise taking your boyfriend to Brize Norton. Pick him up from there, fine, but dropping him off is another story altogether. If he's going with a Unit then it's unlikely he'll be able to travel independently anyway. Mr B went as an individual augmentee so he had no parent unit, was completely on his own and I still refused to get him to Brize. It's a bloody miserable place for departures and not much better for arrivals.

And your journey home will be crap.

And another bit of advice - I'd take yours and Miss M's discussions about the specifics of your OH's tours to PM. Just in case.

Thanks ladies

S_T - where are you moving to then? Typical, just as I find this place, you leave, lol! Would be great to meet up and chat to some other ladies in Southampton, though, glad there are quite a few around

Bodger - realised my mistake am just so used to typing up emails to family that I went on autopilot there. Have edited and will try to keep my bloody fuzzy head in one piece in future

Thank you for the advice about seeing him off ... I'm not sure about it yet, as I said, we've not broached the subject yet, but it is quite likely that he will be travelling with the unit. Does that mean that I wouldn't be able to see him off, even if I wanted to? I mean, meeting him there, for example? I have friends in Coventry and they have offered for me to stay there overnight when he leaves, just to make sure I am looked after and not on my own, so if I do see him off, I'll be straight over there for hugs, tears and a massive bottle of vodka!!

If he's travelling with his unit then I'd leave it at that. Once all the blokes (and girls) are together and set off they go into 'tour' mode and frankly, Mr B when he's in a tour gang isn't a Mr B I'm overly fond of! You might be able to go and wave him off from Brize but you'll have to be booked in at the Guard Room etc and remember that you'll probably be just about the only one and he'll end up looking after you and not spending time with his mates. It's not impossible to do, just a bit of a ball ache and saying goodbye to him at home is a lot less stressful (for both of you) than it is in Brize.

And have you seen the time of day they usually have to get there?!

You make some very valid points. Especially about having to get up at stupid-o-clock!!

I just assumed that loads of people would be there seeing them off? But I certainly don't want to me kippie-on-my-lonesome, lol, that would be horrid, and even worse for him having to look after me. Oh no. That won't do at all.

I can't explain it, though. Saying goodbye at home, well, he'll still BE here. In the UK I mean. So it's like a double goodbye, at home and then a call or text just before he leaves camp. I kinda wat goodbye to be goodbye, just one, and know that he has actually left, and not still here but I just can't see/touch/hear him ... I don't know if that makes any sense :-/

There won't be many people there waving people off because most know that you could be there for bloody days! 2+ days in Brize waiting for a flight isn't unheard of.

If you want to make goodbye really goodbye, then you could tell him not to contact you again once he's left your door until he lands in theatre. Job jobbed.

Mr Laws been away loads. Have never "seen him off" but always go get him :-)

Mr S is either picked up or I drop him off at a layby. We say goodbye at home, normally just see you later, nothing too big, we always have picture of us together that day too. Not sure why just a silly tradition. I'm then at home no need to drive anywhere and can get to the wine a bit quicker. That works for me.

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Mr tree usually leaves at stupid o'clock so he gets a mumbled 'mm love you too bye' at best then I roll over and go back to sleep! But mr tree and I are both emotionally retarded laugh at funeral type of people so we don't do emotional scenes happy or sad.

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I used to put sparkly glitter in my parcels as i KNEW it would get everywhere and would make him giggle!
Things not to send
1) chocolate
2) home made picallili
and under no circumstance send both of those in the same box - as even if you do carefully wrap everything - it still explodes into a silly mess!!

I used to get the mick taken out me as I called them Hand E Blueys!! (but its a term that stuck) Like Feisty one I emailed daily (I used to send him a quiz everyday) , the eblueys I sent got delivered twice a week (this was TELIC) and they were general wittering with pictures etc, and the handwritten stuff was the soppy stuff. Bless him he kept the lot!!