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Discuss Does this seem fair? in Partners - Wives, Girlfriends, Boyfriends, Husbands on Rear Party; I'm sorry but I really need to let off some steam, I know everyone is going to tell me that its their job but seriously it does not seem fair. The Navy pride themselves on ...
  1. #1
    Senior Member hammyswife's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2010
    Devon, United Kingdom

    Does this seem fair?

    I'm sorry but I really need to let off some steam, I know everyone is going to tell me that its their job but seriously it does not seem fair.

    The Navy pride themselves on family time etc and how important it is. My husband works in stores and IS the only one of the team that travels home at weekends and has to stay there all week on the ship apart from 1 who lives in Scotland so only goes home in the leave holidays.

    He went back to work on Monday and one of the female members revealed that she was pregnant (quite timely when she had a weekend duty to do) anyway, my hubby usually stays all week and always puts in extra time after work and given jobs to do which he quite happily does as hes not really got much else to do and will do his weekend duty fair and square at some point each month.

    EVERYONE else lives closeby in Plymouth and can go home everynight apart from dutys, YET he was told today that he was covering the weekend duty as everyone else had refused. This wouldn't have been a problem apart from the fact that the ship is going away on sea trials next Friday as planned, which means that he now is away for 7 weeks technically because he has had another 2 added on with this duty.

    Now to me that this doesn't seem fair, 1. that names wern't put in a hat, or a fair discussion etc 2. He is the only one that travels, therefore someone who lives in Plymouth could have covered the weekend no problem and gone home all week the next week which my hubby doesn't have the luxury of. It just doesn't seem fair, there seems to be no teamwork or even just a little compassion. My OH knows its his job but he has really lost alot of faith in his coworkers today when they all went home and basically couldn't give a toss that he has now added another 2 weeks on top of the four week sea trials planned next week.

    Oh and to top it off, when he was ringing me from the ship this evening, two of the team decided to stay on ship this weekend because they wanted an all weekend booze up with the scot who also lives on the ship... kinda nonsensical if I must say.

    I hope someone agrees

  2. #2
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2006
    Kebabstan, Essex
    No, it does not sound fair, but then sometimes life in the forces just isn't. Perhaps it is just a case of he is the only person suitable/trained/responsible so he was the obvious choice for some reason. But then, I can remember having similar things happen in civvy street that just did not seem fair at the time - but you just have to suck it up.

    That sounds harsh, I just hope that the extra effort and commitment will work in his favour at his next promotion point.

    Chin up Chick


  3. #3
    Senior Member becsj's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2010
    It is rubbish, and I feel for you. I'm in a rubbish lack-of leave and time situation this summer, even though OH is only back from tour in March, and I think that it's the lack of control and say that make's it so annoying. It's that it's a cr**py situation but there's sod all you can do about it!

    Hey ho.

  4. #4
    Senior Member Mrs_M's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2010
    Cloud cuckoo land!
    Thats pretty shitty I have to say.
    When I was a singly living in, I volunteered to do guard duty over christmas because my workmate who had been told he was doing it was supposed to be going home 200 miles away and spending it with his 9 month old daughter. It didn't matter to me, I was doing nights and my mum was about 30 mins from the camp so I was allowed to spend christmas day with her as long as I was back to start my duty at 7pm.

    I'd like to think there were still people like that out there that would think of their colleagues but maybe that time has gone. I know doing a duty is shit but we've all got to do it at some point.

  5. #5
    Senior Member Josephine's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2006
    I wouldn't say the 'pregnancy' lass was doing it on purpose, mainly because the med centre would know and for insurance reasons, she's not allowed to stay on ship, when 'expecting'.

    Gone are the days of people chucking themselves down a ladder, that use to be amusing!

    Unfortunately, it's not fair but it's 1st come, 1st served, dipped out/in etc. If they knew it was her duty weekend, chances are most would have gone to the boss and made an excuse that they have plans (which happens a lot). And again, ypou'll hear this alot but 'it's life in a blue suit', I'm affraid.

    Although, OST/BOST/DOST, it's like a living nightmare and he will get time off afterwards, so don't worry x
    Could crop circles be the work of a cereal killer?

  6. #6
    Senior Member WhiteRose's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2009
    Sunny Hampshire
    Chin up there, HW. This happens a lot on my hubby's ship. It always seems to be the same people getting out of doing duties. Last time hubby was at OST, he was the only person not able to get back home for a weekend during the 7 weeks because of the duty roster. Mind you, it turned out that one weekend everyone was kept on board at sea so all those who wanted to get away couldn't.... So it works both ways.

    We still don't know the programme for this year yet. We have a couple of big family events and we still can't say what's happening. Will we have Easter leave, are they away on deployment, are they going through OST again, are we having summer leave? Talk about the lack of planning

    It's really not fair, I know. It gets my goat when the RN publicity machine and individual captains/commanders say families are so very important for the ship's company. Yeah, of course they are.
    "Nothing travels faster than the speed of light with the possible exception of bad news, which obeys its own special laws."

  7. #7
    Senior Member spanner's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    It's so frustrating and even worse because you were so looking forward to weekend. Keep smiling though.

    As all have said it happens everywhere, at Mr S's place there are those who 'get out' of duties, going away, for one reason or another.
    They are the ones who don't get a slice of cake, when I make one for the tea bar!

    It happens were I work, it's just easier to ask those who say yes, than those who you have to work on. It's taken me 2 years to get someone where I work to work bank holidays, and that's retail and it's in contract of employment.

    On the bright side least you can leave those leg hairs grow a bit longer

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