Thread: Need a place to moan? Don't need a reply? Fill your boots!

Today i would like to rant about BRA'S...yes ladies those contraptions of torture that we cram our bosums into on a daily basis then remove at night with a sigh of happiness. However, that is not the basis of my rant..oh no! :x

My rant is about the purchasing of them. Some of you larger boobed ladies may agree that its a nightmare to find a bra that doesn't either look like scaffolding, a hammock or something your granny would be proud to wear 8O

You pass a lingerie shop, you spy a bra in the window and you think ' cor thats nice' and you amble in for a closer look. Franctically you rummage through the rails with bra's falling around your ears, desperate to find the one in your size.....finally you spot it, its a cup size smaller, but what the hell you think, i'll just try it anyway.

Excitedly you trot into the changing room and remove the tatty grey washed thing that is presently gracing your assets, the one that only has one undewire as the other got lost in the wash somewhere. Smirking, you try on the new one that promises to give you the uplift of a 16 year old and the cleavage of a welsh valley and.......It dont bloody fit!!.... Franctically you squish and squash your boobs about, you suck your tummy in, adjust the straps and still........it dont bloody fit!!! You now have four boobs and a spare tyre around your back. :twisted:

Dejectedly you replace it with your tatty grey washed one wired rag and trail out of the fitting room. Back in the shop you rummage round some more bra's before asking the assistant if they stock your size. The assistant raises a perfectly arch plucked eyebrow and informes you in a voice that oozes distaste that they're hidden in the darkest corner of the shop where all freaks should congregate to stop scaring the other customers. :evil:

Defiantly, you march over to the display of bra's that quite frankly look about as sexy as a month old dishcloth and come in a variety of three designs, Gran, Granny and grandma. Your romantic vision of your man being goggle eyed with delight at your new sexiness melts faster than a snowman in the desert to be replaced by your man rolling on the bed, not in throes of passion, but in throes of laughter.

Manufactureres.....WAKE UP.

I dont want a bra that is 'practical' and pushes my boobs out like two bloody traffic cones with shoulder straps like Mr Bossys webbing, i want a bra thats lacey and sexy. Who cares that once its off my boobs disappear into my armpits or into my waistband?? At least let me FEEL good for 10 minutes for gawds sake!! :twisted: :twisted:

Bossy, Bravissimo do great, non-Granny bras for the more endowed ladies. I was at their store recently just off George Sq in Glasgow and they had a really good range. I can call them and find out where their other stores are as it's a nationwide shop
Sarah

At those prices???? 8O

Originally Posted by GM_1000

PSS - I'd be spitting mad if my boyf did anything like that! If you've committed to doing something important then you've committed to doing it! Can't his mum go and visit him another time? Seems like she can be more flexible than he can.

Well I thought it was fishy at first, but because it's a long weekend for her she's decided to go and see him coz she'll have the time. But then, she could go any other time and use holidays from work! I dont know really, I feel so let down but I dont wanna be a spoilt cow and kick up a fuss coz of it. But now I might not see him until December!

Bossy: HERE HERE!!!!!!!!! I too am of a larger bra size and cant for the life of me find a nice bra that is comfy and makes my boobs look nice. I found one in Asda (for only £8!!) and now they've stopped bloody makin them havent they! :roll:

Is it worth gently mentioning this to him/her? Is it possible to have a discussion about it? What does he want?

Well he kept saying sorry and he said he felt bad, but his mum's never been there before. He rings me sometimes an I'm wanting him to ring tonight but I'm not sure if he will. He knows I'm gutted, she might not even come yet coz she needs her passport renewing, but I'd guess he'd want to see his mum more than come to a wedding.

Originally Posted by PinkStarSky

Bossy: HERE HERE!!!!!!!!! I too am of a larger bra size and cant for the life of me find a nice bra that is comfy and makes my boobs look nice. I found one in Asda (for only £8!!) and now they've stopped bloody makin them havent they! :roll:

I bought 3 from Asda in Cardiff about 4 years ago - haven't seen them since, so now it's back to wearing poxy DOREEN!! :evil:

Who the hell can feel sexy in a bra called Doreen???

Originally Posted by bossyboots

Today i would like to rant about BRA'S...yes ladies those contraptions of torture that we cram our bosums into on a daily basis then remove at night with a sigh of happiness however, that is not the basis of my rant..oh no! :x

My rant is about the purchasing of them. Some of you larger boobed ladies may agree that its a nightmare to find a bra that doesn't either look like scaffolding, a hammock or something your granny would be proud to wear 8O

You pass a lingerie shop, you spy a bra in the window and you think ' cor thats nice' and you amble in for a closer look. Franctically you rummage through the rails with bra's falling around your ears, desperate to find the one in your size.....finally you spot it, its a cup size smaller, but what the hell you think, i'll just try it anyway.

Excitedly you trot into the changing room and remove the tatty grey washed thing that is presently gracing your assets, the one that only has one undewire as the other got lost in the wash somewhere, smirking you try on the new one that promises to give you the uplift of a 16 year old and the cleavage of a welsh mountain side and.......it dont bloody fit!! franctically you squish and squash your boobs about, you suck your tummy in, adjust the straps and still........it dont bloody fit!!! You now have four boobs and a spare tyre around your back.

Dejectedly you replace it with your tatty grey washed one wired rag and trail out of the fitting room. Back in the shop you rummage round some more bra's before asking the assistant if they stock your size. The assistant raises a perfectly arch plucked eyebrow and informes you in a voice that oozes distaste that they're hidden in the darkest corner of the shop where all freaks should congregate to stop scaring the other customers.

Defiantly, you march over to the display of bra's that quite frankly look about as sexy as a month old dishcloth and come in a variety of three designs, Gran, Granny and grandma. Your romantic vision of your man being goggle eyed with delight at your new sexiness melts faster than a snowman in the desert to be replaced by your man rolling on the bed, not in throes of passion, but in throes of laughter.

Manufactureres.....WAKE UP.

I dont want a bra that is 'practical' and pushes my boobs out like two bloody traffic cones with shoulder straps like Mr Bossys webbing, i want a bra thats lacey and sexy. Who cares that once its off my boobs disappear into my armpits or into my waistband?? At least let me FEEL good for gawds sake!! :twisted: :twisted:

Bossy you have brightened up my night i aint laughed that much in ages everythink you said was spot on..... I always find that the assistant that raises that perfectly arch plucked eyebrow has perfect boobs bi*ch

And newt i love the doreen line it made me chuckle

Aah...but theres a secret there Sigwife..see, when the surgeon did the assistants face lift, not only did it raise her eyebrows, but also her boobs ( with the help of a dab of silicone). Look closely and you will not only see a drawstring on the top of her head...but also a faint shadow where her poobes hit her chin :lol:

Gawd, that was bitchy, but hell it felt grand...hello voddy :lol:

IM BACK...thank god!! Bossy you're still making me howl!! lol

DOREEN??? dear gawd, why dont they just call it Mabel and be done with it 8O

or Gertrude?

Bossy - My mother was, until last Christmas, one of those assistants in a well known lingerie store!! Being in her late 40's, she too was intimidated by some of the younger girls that she worked with!!

I aint intimidated by them D_B, i'm just bloody irritated by them. :twisted:

She hated it - but on the plus side, anyone over the age of 18 looking for a bra fitting at least had someone older and more sensitive to deal with. Hated it when she left, got loads of great discounts!!

Dont even go there D_B :evil:

The last time i decided to be measured, the only time bear in mind, the bint faffed about with a tape measure and then came back with a choice of gran, granny and grandma bra's :twisted:

Store she worked in does quite a nice range - I'm in the same boat as you Bossy and have found some quite nice underwear in there.... though their measuring services leave alot to be desired!!

Today i would like to gripe about folk banging on my door to sell me the latest special offers and other rubbish! :twisted:

If i wanted to change my gas supplier, phone supplier, windows, facias, buy new dusters or the latest 'miracle' cleaner that with no more effort than squeezing the bloody trigger..i would contact the relevant companies.

But oh no 'Mr i am doing this because i am desperate please let me rip you off' salesman has other ideas.

You just get comfy, hop in the bath, sit down with the phone for a jolly good gossip with your best mate ( not all at the same time, but it has been known) and suddenly the glass in the front door threatens to implode. You trot off to the door, leaving behind your freshly made cuppa or your tea on the table, yank open the door and there stands some suited, booted bloke who looks like he would flog your grannies false teeth.

Bossy ' yes?' :twisted:
Spotty man 'Good afternoon modom'
Bossy ' it was!' :twisted:
Spotty salesman ' oh haha, i'm from joe brown and i........'
Bossy 'bugger off' :twisted:
Spotty salesman ' oh er, perhaps your husband may......
Bossy ' are you deaf? :twisted:
Spotty salesman 'no' :?
Bossy ' i see, just thick then? :twisted:
Spotty salesman ' oh haha well i can see its a bad time, perhaps when your husband..... 8O
Bossy ' he aint here, bugger off' :twisted:

Now this leads me to believe that the spotty salesman is indeed either thick in the head or thick in the skin....or both, because no matter how many times i repeat bugger off he aint budged, in fact he now has his foot in the door and it is dangerously close to being amputated.
Eventually i manage to get rid of him by brute force and i smirk as he hobbles back up the garden path with a very sore foot and an even sorer pair of ears.

Spotty salesmen be warned......BUGGER OFF!!! :twisted: :twisted:

Originally Posted by bossyboots

Today i would like to gripe about folk banging on my door to sell me the latest special offers and other rubbish! :twisted:

If i wanted to change my gas supplier, phone supplier, windows, facias, buy new dusters or the latest 'miracle' cleaner that with no more effort than squeezing the bloody trigger..i would contact the relevant companies.

But oh no 'Mr i am doing this because i am desperate please let me rip you off' salesman has other ideas.

You just get comfy, hop in the bath, sit down with the phone for a jolly good gossip with your best mate ( not all at the same time, but it has been known) and suddenly the glass in the front door threatens to implode. You trot off to the door, leaving behind your freshly made cuppa or your tea on the table, yank open the door and there stands some suited, booted bloke who looks like he would flog your grannies false teeth.

Bossy ' yes?' :twisted:
Spotty man 'Good afternoon modom'
Bossy ' it was!' :twisted:
Spotty salesman ' oh haha, i'm from joe brown and i........'
Bossy 'bugger off' :twisted:
Spotty salesman ' oh er, perhaps your husband may......
Bossy ' are you deaf? :twisted:
Spotty salesman 'no' :?
Bossy ' i see, just thick then? :twisted:
Spotty salesman ' oh haha well i can see its a bad time, perhaps when your husband..... 8O
Bossy ' he aint here, bugger off' :twisted:

Now this leads me to believe that the spotty salesman is indeed either thick in the head or thick in the skin....or both, because no matter how many times i repeat bugger off he aint budged, in fact he now has his foot in the door and it is dangerously close to being amputated.
Eventually i manage to get rid of him by brute force and i smirk as he hobbles back up the garden path with a very sore foot and an even sorer pair of ears.

Spotty salesmen be warned......BUGGER OFF!!! :twisted: :twisted:

I understand your point, but at the same time salesmen are just doing their job, that they were employed and are getting paid to do. It's not really their fault. I always find that a firm "I'm not interested thankyou" and close the door works fine.

Originally Posted by Trix

Originally Posted by bossyboots

Today i would like to gripe about folk banging on my door to sell me the latest special offers and other rubbish! :twisted:

If i wanted to change my gas supplier, phone supplier, windows, facias, buy new dusters or the latest 'miracle' cleaner that with no more effort than squeezing the bloody trigger..i would contact the relevant companies.

But oh no 'Mr i am doing this because i am desperate please let me rip you off' salesman has other ideas.

You just get comfy, hop in the bath, sit down with the phone for a jolly good gossip with your best mate ( not all at the same time, but it has been known) and suddenly the glass in the front door threatens to implode. You trot off to the door, leaving behind your freshly made cuppa or your tea on the table, yank open the door and there stands some suited, booted bloke who looks like he would flog your grannies false teeth.

Bossy ' yes?' :twisted:
Spotty man 'Good afternoon modom'
Bossy ' it was!' :twisted:
Spotty salesman ' oh haha, i'm from joe brown and i........'
Bossy 'bugger off' :twisted:
Spotty salesman ' oh er, perhaps your husband may......
Bossy ' are you deaf? :twisted:
Spotty salesman 'no' :?
Bossy ' i see, just thick then? :twisted:
Spotty salesman ' oh haha well i can see its a bad time, perhaps when your husband..... 8O
Bossy ' he aint here, bugger off' :twisted:

Now this leads me to believe that the spotty salesman is indeed either thick in the head or thick in the skin....or both, because no matter how many times i repeat bugger off he aint budged, in fact he now has his foot in the door and it is dangerously close to being amputated.
Eventually i manage to get rid of him by brute force and i smirk as he hobbles back up the garden path with a very sore foot and an even sorer pair of ears.

Spotty salesmen be warned......BUGGER OFF!!! :twisted: :twisted:

I understand your point, but at the same time salesmen are just doing their job, that they were employed and are getting paid to do. It's not really their fault. I always find that a firm "I'm not interested thankyou" and close the door works fine.

It doesn't for me Im afraid, I do try the polite approach but it falls on deaf ears :cry: