Thread: Too posh to push

Originally Posted by Armylady

I don't think for one second people should be able to request it, its a major operation.

Even if their phobia of childbirth is so extreme they'd rather have an abortion? 'I have a phobia of pregnancy' | Life and style | The Guardian

Originally Posted by kazzam

From reading the coverage it doesn't look like it'll be a simple case of asking for a section and getting one with no questions being asked or options discussed. Apparently something like 6 - 10% of women are estimated to have a phobia of childbirth. I just have a phobia of hearing about other people's birth experiences *shudders*.

As an aside I'm genuinely bemused by how interested a lot of women seem to be in how other women give birth. Personally I have no more interest in how someone else gives birth than in what cereal they have for breakfast. I could do with a tummy tuck though.

I couldn't give a fig if someone decides to squat in the woods chanting sacred rites to deliver their baby, thats their choice. It's when they decide to put pressure on a massively underfunded NHS that irks me.

Worst case scenario:

"Daz rekons I'll 'ave a baggy fanny if I av a kid" Cue hours of wasted consultations with midwives, mental health midwives, consultants, and the end result is a costly proceedure for no reason other than "it's my 'umen rite'", then heaven forbid a legal aid funded compensation claim should infection set in!

It can and will happen!

As me and my OH we're discussing last night, could you imagine being in the situation of an emergency c-section (as we were) but being told you had to wait because they were still working on all the elective c-sections?

For us it was life or death, and frankly anyone clogging up the already clogged up system needs their head seeing to.

It'll be interesting to see if the numbers of sections do go up and what the resulting cost is compared to things like alcohol, smoking and obesity related conditions. If it goes the way of the US where it seems they really push (no pun intended) sections over natural delivery then I'd imagine the cost would be immense.

I have a phobia of pregnancy after my second, reason why i won't try for the third that the OH wants so bad. Plus not wanting another c section which i've already been told i'd have.

Midwifes and health Visitor should be doing there jobs and helping and resuring women that natural birth is not as bad as everyone makes out.

My first pregnancy i avoided everyone talking about child birth so i wouldn't be scared or worried but my midwife was great and took me though everything that would happen without scaring the crap out of me.

Maybe putting funding towards helping people become midwifes would be better.

Originally Posted by Armylady

Midwifes and health Visitor should be doing there jobs and helping and resuring women that natural birth is not as bad as everyone makes out.

Maybe putting funding towards helping people become midwifes would be better.

Because people are allowed to decide if they want to have a C-Section or not does not suggest that midwifes are not doing their jobs.

You also need to look at the number of Midwifes who are unable to get work because there's no jobs. It's not a lack of trained midwifes issue at all.

Maybe it's just personal to me then i saw 2 midwifes in the uk and both put me off having my babies.

Maybe i was listen to the news wrong yesterday, when it came to the lack of midwifes.

Originally Posted by WhiteRose

As me and my OH we're discussing last night, could you imagine being in the situation of an emergency c-section (as we were) but being told you had to wait because they were still working on all the elective c-sections?

For us it was life or death, and frankly anyone clogging up the already clogged up system needs their head seeing to.

They won't do that - emergencies will always jump the queue. I was 2 hours late into theatre with DS as an emergency came down.

Originally Posted by Armylady

Maybe it's just personal to me then i saw 2 midwifes in the uk and both put me off having my babies.

Maybe i was listen to the news wrong yesterday, when it came to the lack of midwifes.

It's lack of funding for midwifes jobs. Not lack of midwifes.

Because of your opinion of Midwifes, doesnt mean that theyre not doing their job properly.

It's a Consultant's decision for C-Section. Not a midwifes'.

Sorry it was shit for you, I know way too much medical stuff to be comfortable with either natural birthing or 'elective' C-Section

I would be very interested in reading the research that has lead to the change in policy, ill have a dog around and when I can be bothered.

Sorry i shouldn't put all midwifes in the same catagory.

I agree with armylady on some points. I think midwifery care needs to be more consistent. I've had kids in two different parts of the country and they were totally different experiences.

In Colchester I was lucky enough to be under the Iceni team. If they still exist they are the most fabulous people I ever had the fortune to be looked after by. It is two teams of midwives about 6 in each team. You are given your own specific midwife (mine was a South-African, take-no-shit woman called Lisbeth) and I met the entire team long before I went into labour. I really trusted Lisbeth and had formed a bond with her. All of my antenatal appointments were done at home so I was always very relaxed and felt calm and at ease in my own surroundings. yes the whole thing went tits up when I went into labour but that was my body's fault not my midwife's and she was fighting my corner right up until she signed me off from her care.

The second was born in Southampton and there really was no continuity of care. I had a named midwife but couldn't ever contact her if i had a problem so ended up just going to see any midwife. I'm not saying it would have made a difference because we'll never know but maybe if I had had a midwife I had formed a bond of trust with we would have gotten to know each other and I would have felt confident enough to try for the vbac (obviously given the issues little tree had i'm glad it never happened but being as i actually went into slow labour 16 days before i had him maybe it wouldn't have happened if i'd had him when he had decided to arrive?)

I do have a lot of 'what if's' when it comes to my ante-natal care with little tree and i do feel that I was let down by the system. But I also know 3 other people who had babies within a year of little tree who all lived on the same street as me 9something in the water) who all experienced the same thing and felt let down.

I am not in any way blaming the midwives, I know they work their arses off on a small budget and usually understaffed. I would much rather see the money that will be spent on these elective c sections spent on continuity of care and giving every trust area the facilities to do what the Iceni team did in Colchester.

I've seen three midwives / teams so far. My first was in BFG, and she was utterly amazing. Never too busy to talk through any questions I had, and helped make the pregnancy an absolute pleasure.

The second was my M/w in Nottingham, who again was so reassuring when I spoke to her about a home birth, she talked me through the process and was brilliant.

Now I am back home I alternate between two m/wives and they are both fantastic, they know me and my little girl by first name, make phone calls to my house, have gone through everything with me umpteen times and I if I am lucky enough to come off consultant care next week, I have every faith in either of them being at the birth with me.

I have friends who have totally different stories to me, I think it's luck of the draw, but I can honestly say that I have not had one bad experience with midwives in the community or at the hospital.

Its all about risk management and balancing that risk.
I think if you are young and healthy then natural is best. If you already had a succesful natural birth previously, then natural is best.
If you ended up having IVF by your own purse and had to work extremely hard to service that cost and are classed as an older mum (like me) and have close family for whom an IVF birth went very very wrong ending in a young person with Cerebral Palsy (like my family), then you will be glad to elect directly for a CS. You are willing to do do ANYTHING to ensure the baby is born with minimal trauma.

At the maternity unit I work in we refuse the right to elective sections unless there is a clinical reason for it. Depends on the trust guidelines, not all will follow it. I love bringing babies into the world naturally!

I had my 1st baby under the Essex Rivers Healthcare trust, I have nothing but praise for them.

Thats fab, such a shame when women have bad experiences. Wish it could always be a pleasant experience for them!

My experience of having Little Miss in BFG was really positive. Sure the German Pediatric Nurses were terrifying and forced me to bottle feed when I desperately didn't want to - but now I know better feeding-wise, I'd do it again over there like a shot. Alas, we now live in England where the standard of care in comparrison is so bad it's just not funny.
As far as C-sections are concerned, I can't think of anything I'd want less. After a natural birth at 7pm, I got up the next morning and got on with life, I didn't have dressings and pain and unable to lift things and unable to drive for weeks. I didn't get MRSA or infections or botched stiching. I also didn't get the joy of being awake whilst a young surgeon who had been on shift for 72 hours straight without sleep cut me open painlessly but whilst able to feel the cutting and pulling. Ye Gods!
Natural birth holds no fear for me (once you get to a certain point the baby is coming out, there's nothing you can do but accept this fact and get through it), but being plonked on an operating table in a lovely clean British Hospital... I'd rather give birth a la Breaking Dawn and have a slightly effeminate teenager rip me open with his teeth!

Originally Posted by Siddneey

Thats fab, such a shame when women have bad experiences. Wish it could always be a pleasant experience for them!

Alas it was not a pleasant experience. Went wrong from start to finish and ended up in a very quick emergency c section. However the staff were wonderful and I really felt like my midwife (who had been with me right through my pregnancy) was fighting my corner so when I was physically unable to fight it myself I knew she was doing. My only complaint was that they used staples to fasten me up and ye gods they hurt coming out!!

Don't know how to multi quote but Crafty it's funny cos c sections hold no fear for me but natural births do. I had an elective c section with little tree because after finally tracking down my notes no-one could be sure that what went wrong with big tree wouldn't happen again only with more disastrous consequences this time. I would have loved the whole experience of a natural birth, the pain was never something I feared but the thought of my baby not surviving was my fear. I couldn't shake it right the way through my pregnancy, I had nightmares every night for months always the same thing, that I had a natural birth and he didn't survive.

Despite opting for the elective (which in my justification was the right decision little tree had the cord wrapped round his neck tightly and mec in his waters) a part of me will always pine for the fact that I never got to hold my babies properly immediately after they were born.