(Just need to get some things out of my head)
Because everytime I do it gets screwed up, twisted and told to others in a messed up fashion.
I spent the majority of my teens trying to please everyone else as I believed that if they were happy then so was I, how wrong was I?! I then tried to make myself happy and got messed about by numerous 'friends' making me feel pretty worthless and useless. So many times I thought I was happy and then I would discover that my world
I'm back at my 'proper' job and I couldn't be happier, back with the dogs and even though I had one dog latch on to my top cos I wasn't giving him the attention he wanted and another decided it was time to push his luck - just happens to be this one that I've been given to work with, hmm.... that'll be interesting. I also get another one who is a bit of a nutter but adorable at the same time, I'm so going to love being back there spending my days surrounded by 4 legged friends and getting away from
Well today I finally worked out how long it is before I'm 'free' so to speak, 325 days or 296 if you take off the leave I currently have booked.
I honestly have so much respect for the guys and girls who cope well with this stuff, your life in someone else's hands, what you do day to day being the choice of another that doesn't seem to notice that you are actually a human being who needs a life too.
Over the last few months I have been losing my drive for my job, well
Today was a good day, today I passed my fitness test - something that has been haunting me for sometime now and the main reason I got my personal trainer and probably one of the main reasons I've been so down recently but hey its gone now and I don't have to do it again for another 6 months!!!!
I went 'running' yesterday and didn't do too badly, certainly running faster (time on my nike+ said so) just need to start running for longer and resting for less. The concentration now is
We ran 5km today in 40 mins, well ok it wasn't all running but still thats a good start as apparently our first run was 2.30 mins and our last was 5 mins which is really good. My press ups are improving apparently and I do feel stronger with them, considering I hate doing them but hey its part of the job.
I am also back to my starting weight of 11st 10!! woooooohooooooo so there is only one way to go from here and I am making sure thats down!
I even went running by
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