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Discuss Not safe for Facebook Status updates... in Itch & Bitch on Rear Party; Right - I know you lot love your Facebook more than Twitter (if the pathetic amount of people following RP is anything to go by) so... A new thread - not safe for Facebook status ...
  
  1. #1
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    Not safe for Facebook Status updates...

    Right - I know you lot love your Facebook more than Twitter (if the pathetic amount of people following RP is anything to go by) so...

    A new thread - not safe for Facebook status messages

    What would you LOVE to say but daren't because of the friends/family/work colleagues you have on there?

    Mine to start with :

    EvilOlive Adjutant is trying very hard not to bi-ch slap the moaning gits on her FB when they've got NOTHING wrong in their lives...

    And over to you...

  2. #2
    Senior Member flygirl's Avatar
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    Re: Not safe for Facebook Status updates...

    Urghh the amount of times I would love to truly put up on my status exactly what I'm thinking

    I reckon if I was to do so though I may well be sectioned, forced into AA or be disowned from my completely dysfunctional family (actually that may not be such a bad thing )

    Actually I really find it frustrating when I come across a really hilarious joke or link I would post up but don't for fear of offending the masses and only tickling the few. I have a pretty warped sense of humour with very little in the way of boundaries and so really have to watch myself there.........especially when the in-laws can see everything I'm posting

  3. #3
    Moderator Gonzo's Avatar
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    Re: Not safe for Facebook Status updates...

    >>>wonders if you actually have a life judging by your facebook updates (and then thinks .. hmm do I...lmao)

    Edited to add: get a grip, he's away for a week, not a f*cking year.

    Can't you look after your own kids instead of get everybody else to do it.

    Is not going back to the UK from Cyprus because she is sick of the rows at her in-laws.

    DILLIGAF

    The list could be endless!!!

  4. #4
    Senior Member flygirl's Avatar
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    Re: Not safe for Facebook Status updates...

    DILLIGAF! love it

  5. #5
    Junior Member didi's Avatar
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    Re: Not safe for Facebook Status updates...

    how about my god stop with all these stupid games like Mafia wars, Farmf**k and all the rest, get a life or a job or something.

    AND people who put personal and private msgs on facebook need hunting down and bitch slappng around their town.

    e.g does he love me oh the pain of it. dont love my family anymore because ...........
    potential likes this.
    Then his eye welled a tear that held no regret,
    "Just tell us you love us, and never forget.
    To fight for our rights back at home while we're gone,
    To stand your own watch, no matter how long.
    For when we come home, either standing or dead,
    To know you remember we fought and we bled.
    Is payment enough, and with that we will trust,
    That we mattered to you as you mattered to us."

  6. #6
    Senior Member Special_Tree's Avatar
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    Re: Not safe for Facebook Status updates...

    In total agreement with all the farming shite and fish world and god knows what other worlds step out of your front door and believe it or not there the REAL WORLD!!
    Musiqbiz likes this.

  7. #7
    Senior Member Eye_of_Newt's Avatar
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    Re: Not safe for Facebook Status updates...

    Quote Originally Posted by Special_Tree
    In total agreement with all the farming shite and fish world and god knows what other worlds step out of your front door and believe it or not there the REAL WORLD!!
    But how am I supposed to improve my herd of llamas without asking for more???

    Tact is for people who aren't witty enough to be sarcastic.

  8. #8
    Moderator bigbird67's Avatar
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    Re: Not safe for Facebook Status updates...

    Mine would say, at this moment


    ...really needs a poo but is too idle to walk upstairs, so is instead, clenching her buttocks and squeaking out the occasional really rancid fart!!!
    Truth
    Behind The Username



    "You're just like an itch that I'd love to scratch… with a fucking chainsaw."

  9. #9
    Senior Member Mrs_M's Avatar
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    Re: Not safe for Facebook Status updates...

    Mine would say "I wish my f**king family would stop arguing over everything to do with uncle, he's alive, he's here and thats all that matters now grow up!" but that would just cause even more arguments

  10. #10
    CK
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    Re: Not safe for Facebook Status updates...

    at the moment, mine would say


    I'm fked off to high heaven with "fluff" and "love" and "peace" and crap. Why can't there be some real banter and giggles?

    Oh, and to the person who has been bothering me at work ref. complaining about xyz - FUCK OFF! Go hang yourself.

  11. #11
    Senior Member charlie_five's Avatar
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    Re: Not safe for Facebook Status updates...

    How did I miss this gem of a thread?! It's up there with 'great texts I never sent'!! I'll come back to this in a bit!
    I can't decide whether to be a good example or a horrible warning

  12. #12
    Senior Member Wench's Avatar
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    Re: Not safe for Facebook Status updates...

    I think at the moment, mine would be to a friend who is "emotionally distraught" because the guy she has been "seeing" for 4 weeks, but has only met TWICE, has dumped her.

    FFS get a grip woman!! Stop bitching about him being such a tw@, don't call it "love" after 12 hours of chatting on msn and if you don't like the "men" you attract, change the bait!!

    Thanks for letting me get that off my chest )

    J
    Land Girl likes this.

  13. #13
    Junior Member didi's Avatar
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    Re: Not safe for Facebook Status updates...

    or simply

    get a life
    Then his eye welled a tear that held no regret,
    "Just tell us you love us, and never forget.
    To fight for our rights back at home while we're gone,
    To stand your own watch, no matter how long.
    For when we come home, either standing or dead,
    To know you remember we fought and we bled.
    Is payment enough, and with that we will trust,
    That we mattered to you as you mattered to us."

  14. #14
    Junior Member little_chiroptera's Avatar
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    Recently I'd like to say:

    "If you have nothing better to post about than "The Only Way is Essex" or how much you hate your job, why don't you just shut the f*ck up?! Nobody cares!"

  15. #15
    Senior Member spiderhater's Avatar
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    Def. agree with the amount of wives out there moaning that their husband is away for a week (and I'm not talking civvies here) in our first year of marriage my husband will have been building sandcastles and training to build sandcastles for 8 months give or take. Suck it up!

    Also, I belong to a lot of buying and selling groups, either you people were mad to spend that amount of money on the item in the first place or you're trying to to hike the price which I DO NOT LIKE. Who would be stupid enough to originally spend 1200euros on a 4 wooden chairs and a table for the garden?!?!
    Not quite a newby but not quite there yet either, just settling in to my first patch in Germany.



  16. #16
    Moderator sluice_dweller's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Special_Tree View Post
    In total agreement with all the farming shite and fish world and god knows what other worlds step out of your front door and believe it or not there the REAL WORLD!!
    Gutted, you mean I don't own land in the wilderness with loads of animals and businesses, I'm going to cry now :0(

  17. #17
    Senior Member tattooedlady's Avatar
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    Think mine would be:

    So what? I got a dog? You think I can't do it, well keep your f*cking opinion to yourself - its not like your life is so f*cking brilliant so maybe sort that out before commenting on someone else who is


  18. #18
    Moderator Legs's Avatar
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    "I really don't give a flying figleaf that some football team has beaten another, or some overpaid footballer has got a scratch on his ankle."

    or

    "I have a fucking name, if you can't be courteous enough to use it, fuck off out of my life."

  19. #19
    Senior Member WhiteRose's Avatar
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    There's one I'd love to put but I'd get into trouble:

    Feck off you self-centred, selfish, scrounging, smug f-wit!
    "Nothing travels faster than the speed of light with the possible exception of bad news, which obeys its own special laws."

  20. #20
    Senior Member bootifull's Avatar
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    ooo how proud you must be, 13 year old daughter preggers with twins!

    24 yrs served, dodged every tour because family needs you, bollocks.
    beckyfaye1981 likes this.
    Mimi: "I'm a fat f*ck. I'm a f*cking fat f*cker".

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