Thread: New to all this and moving to Germany!

Hi,

I've been with my boyfriend for about three months now and he's just told me that in five months he's going to be posted in Germany - not too sure where until I speak to him on tuesday, basically he wants me to move with him, so I was just wondering how many others have been in this situation and any advice you have to offer would be brilliant.

I have already PM'd Fally_Fox and been given some great information but just wanted to see what others had to say.

Cheers x

First thing would be what you're planning to do for accommodation. If you're planning on living together in a privately rented place he'd have to get permission to live off-camp which could be a problem depending how long he's been in the army. The other question is what you'd do job-wise. Some civvy jobs on camp will come with accommodation for you (including I think the naaffi) but he wouldn't be able to share with you.

Mr K was based in Germany when we first got together but it never even crossed my mind to move over there as I've got a career in the UK. With cheap flights we managed to see each other every few weeks. It's also worth bearing in mind that even if he's not going on tour he'll be away a lot so you might not see much of him even if you live in Germany.

Don't take this the wrong way but if you've only been seeing him for 3 months it's a hell of a big step to be taking. Personally I'd wait a bit and see how things go.

I'm not taking that the wrong way Kazzam, i've thought of that and definately going to see how it goes, thanks x

My other half has just been posted to germany, and from the advice iv been given on here, you have 4 options...

1. marry him and move over - from what i gather its alright if you're married, you get looked after
2. move over but the army wont give you a second thought if you're not married
3. split up
4. stay where you are, and see how you get on with a long distance thing

I'm still deciding what to do and iv been with my mr for nearly 6 years! xx

Aww, thanks! Happy to help!

Shelley74shelley - The army don't really but the naafi do; they provide you with accommodation (my flat was 2 mins walk from his privately rented German flat, it was brilliant!) and sort all your health insurance etc. Obviously it's way easier if you're married but I don't think it's a reason to get married after only a few months just so you can get a good job. I went for a year to Fallingbostel after only being with my ex for 6 months and it's one of the best things I ever did! I hated only seeing him once a month and always wanted to live abroad, my job was going nowhere and I had no ties here like a flat or a car etc. I would recommend it to anyone, even though it was highly emotional and hard work.

Of course, like Kazzam says, he may go away on tour and you may not see him as much but the bonus I found was that the other girls there may be going through the same thing and everyone rallies round you and there's a great closeness to it all. On a Friday night most people would be out in the pubs and bars so there's always someone to tag along with, and quite often I'd have girls from my accommodation block knocking on the door and coming in for a brew/vodka It was lovely and I miss it. When my ex went to Canada for a few months I was distraught but I found that my mates would keep me busy and they knew exactly what I was going through and gave me tons of good advice, so much more than my friends at home could ever do because they had no idea what life was like that way.

But yes, flights are cheap and waiting a while until he's settled could be a good idea because then he won't have to stress about you settling in whilst he is trying to acclimatise too. I sometimes managed to go home once every 2 months or less, and it was fun flying over to see him before I made my way over too, like a little holiday. The fact I had my own flat (I sometimes had to share but that was part of the fun) was great because I spent most of my time at his flat and used mine for a massive walk-in wardrobe :lol: I seem to remember something about the lads having to have lived on camp for a year before being allowed to live off camp, but I can't be sure.

I wish you both the best of luck, and hope you come to the decision that's right for you xx

I've got to give my experiences here which differ greatly to Fally's. We bought an October wedding forward to January when my husband was posted to Germany. We had been together 8 months at the time. I moved out here, and I have since found it incredibly, INCREDIBLY hard.
We live about 20km away from camp with a very poor bus service to and from camp. As Mr Schuh takes the car to work I am in a German town on a small estate with max of 35 service families. When the old lot were here it was better as there were people around but now the neighbours aren't too friendly so I am stuck out here on my own with a baby.
After three months of looking and applyingI did have a part time job on camp, which was solitary work, nevertheless I enjoyed it.
Every time Mr Schuh and I had a row I felt isolated and scared (no I'm not ashamed to admit it). A marriage or partnership is tough when you first move in together, compounded with separation from friends, family and everything you know it can make you feel quite vulnerable.

Luckily for us we've come out the other end and are happy, but I would warn anyone thinking of moving with someone they've only known a couple of months. It may not be as easy as you think.

I'm glad you've come out the other end happy Schuh, it's definately something I will be taking into consideration and will be giving the whole thing a lot of thought before I make a decision. x

my personal advice would be stay here and visit him as often as you can and vice versa. its still a fairly new relationship. Its hard when they're away like that but it will either make or break your relationship.
My now hubby was posted to Germany about a year into our relationship and I was pregnant with our 1st child. We both now say that had I not been pregnant our relationship would never have stuck it out cos to be honest neither of us would have made much of an effort to see each other!! Now 3 years on we're married with 2 kids and I'm glad thats how we did it. We got married etc in our own time not just because of circumstances the army forced upon us!
Good luck with whatever you decide!

Well the army has made up my mind for me as OH has just told me he's going to the sandy place in March, so will just visit him as much as I can until he goes.

Thanks for all your advice and different points about this, x

Edited to add that have just found out that he's no longer going to Germany but NI instead so that he can go Afghan! x

Hey

Im moving out to Fally at the end of october! Rather scared and nervous about as me and my bf rnt amrried and were moving into rented accomadation to, i know uve sed ur now nt moving there but to ne of the other girls any advice and help wud be muchos appreciated! i have no clue if i get a job and after an email back from the hive im led to understand that i arnt allowed to apply for jobs on camp let alone step foot on it!

Anyonce else out in Fally have a job thats not on camp?

Apply to the Naafi, they are always desperate for staff (shouldn't say that but it's true). That way you don't have to worry about speaking German, and you get to see your oh at naafi break Nice Naafi in Fally too.

I tend to agree with Samm, apply, if you get a job then at least you'll be there and if you don't like it you can start looking for something else - which is always easier when you're there!

I'll be honest though working for NAAFI isn't always what it's meant to be - I worked for them and loved my job but hated the way the company treated me, though I believe it's generally better in BFG (I worked in the UK).

Originally Posted by Bella1989

Hey

Im moving out to Fally at the end of october! Rather scared and nervous about as me and my bf rnt amrried and were moving into rented accomadation to, i know uve sed ur now nt moving there but to ne of the other girls any advice and help wud be muchos appreciated! i have no clue if i get a job and after an email back from the hive im led to understand that i arnt allowed to apply for jobs on camp let alone step foot on it!

Anyonce else out in Fally have a job thats not on camp?

That's balls! You can go on camp as long as someone signs you in and you leave your passport at the desk; you get it back when you leave and sign out.

You can work for the naafi as a UKBC (UK Based Citizen) and you get an ID card that you simply show when entering camp, just like everyone else who lives and works on camp.

Go to www.jobsatnaafi.co.uk and there it'll tell you all about getting a job with them. You have an interview in the UK and then they provide all your insurance etc. for you when you get there, and they even pay for your flight to move there. You can either get a job working in the shops (one big supermarket, where i worked, or one of the smaller local ones) or in one of the bars there.

The naafi isn't the best employer but when I worked in Fally I worked with a fab bunch of people and had a better social life than I do here!

Anything else you want to know just ask and i'll see what i remember

Thanks Fally Fox! ive been so worried im not gonna be able to get a job!
Put me at ease a little bit
So i apply in england and they interview here - sounsd easier than doing it in germany but can i still do it in germany?
Ive been learning german for the past few months ha!
I couldnt care less if i ended up been a cleaner as long as i have something to do so i dnt get bored!

Aww, happy to help!

I was worried too, but when I was over there visiting the ex OH (he lived there before I moved over) I went to the big naafi and asked if they had jobs and had a chat to someone there. I applied here and went to an interview day at Manchester Airport. I'm not sure if you could do it over there, but I don't see why not.

Haha, that's good! I remembered a bit from school and got myself an English to German phrasebook which helped on shopping trips. Try and speak some if you can, I found some shop assistants can be a bit rude but just a simple "Sprachen Sie Englisch?" worked well.

Good luck! Hope the big move goes well. Best thing I ever did, even though I was only there a year
x

Im getting quite good at it now! Shoudl realli be considering how much my tutor costs me! ha!
I applied yesterday so hopefully they'l get back to me as soon as, if not il just have to ask once im over there! not long to go now eeek! Goin to see our house next wednesday for the first time! Not seen my boy for what feels like ages!!

Were r u living now? stil on a base?

xx

A tutor! Wow, that's dedication lol. Hope the house is nice, you'll have to let us know how you get on

I moved back to the UK about 3 years ago now, I've got nothing to do with the army anymore but I still pop on here and give advice if I can. This place helped me sooooo much before I went over and whilst I was there so it's nice to be able to give something back xx

Originally Posted by dorsetgirl

Edited to add that have just found out that he's no longer going to Germany but NI instead so that he can go Afghan! x

Hi. I moved to NI with my now husband in 2008. We had been together only 10 months - 7 of which he was in Afghan, so it was quite a big gamble for me to up and leave, but it paid off.
I couldnt have beared doing the whole long-distance thing, so it was a no-brainer really. We rented a house privately for 18months before getting married 8 weeks ago and moving into a quarter.
He is now deployed again until March, but hopefully we will be making the move back to the mainland before the end of this year.
Are you planning to move over to NI?

I know - big dedication!
The house is nice but living with 3boys has its downfall!
They have to be told to clean lol they wnt just do it!
To which they argue 'were used to been told what to do u ahve to just order us!' lol

I was strugling to get answers to everything the HIVE basically told me not to move yet this place has helped and answered all my questions and helpt me understand alot the terms and language used by my OH which i never understood to lol

xxx

I live in Fally and the NAAFI here is short staffed, so hopefully you will be able to get a job. I love it here - it's fab!