Thread: Shock of the week (big shhh though as if your on fb hardly anyone knows!)

Well I thought I would give you all a update, I went to the docs on wed last week as I was having tummy aches on my left side and being sick, dizzy etc so he decided to send me to a and e as he thought my bp was low and said I could have been anaemic but after 2 days in and out of hospital and a ultra sound later and ive come out with the diagnosis was I'm not sick I'm 6 weeks pregnant ..due on the 22nd may! I haven't really told anyone other than you girls and a few of my closest friends and family as it's early days, I am really nervous as it's my first and as my SO is down in aldershot and I'm in Manchester I'm kinda worried about him seeing it enough etc all my friends have gave me different points of view but so many have been like your going to be a single parent 5 days a week I don't understand why people can't just be happy as I'm fully aware of the fact my fiancé is in the army argh we rant over hope your all well :-) xx

Well Kirsty, I was a single parent for 7 years and then I met my husband, who is a soldier. Now I am a single parent to two kids when he is away. I am not going to pretend it is easy, it isn't (well not all the time anyway). However, I will say this. I am happy, my husband is happy and my children are happy.

Massive congratulations

G xx

Congratulations!! You will make things work - life is never easy (or dull!) with an OH in a green/navy/blue suit... but we wouldn't have it any other way! x

Have you told your OH? Aldershot to Manchester isn't that far, could you move to Aldershot? So long as you're financially and emotionally ready to be a parent go for it, but children are flippin hard work!
By your post I take it birth control failed.

Congratulations to you both.

I think Gonzo has hit the nail on the head, being a 'single parent' in effect while your OH is away won't be easy, but parenthood isn't even when you're not on your own.

Its only natural to worry but I am sure that you and your OH will talk it through until the cows come home- or the little one is born

In the meantime, take care of yourself and take it easy x

Congratulations - I echo RM_WAG_78 XX

my OH is over the moon and hes in n. ireland atm but we have spoke and he loves me and baby to be so much and just because hes a soldier i would never dream of not having a family with him... Birth conrol did fail i was on microgynon (the pill) and told maybe when i was down with a cold while he was on leave it could have been then...
I could move to aldershot but im not sure im ready for the move just yet i have a family up here and friends also a job and ive just started my own business in photography and everything that comes with it like posters etc to drop it all would be cray right now but maybe a few month down the line and i may have changed my mind.
Financially im sure at times we will struggle like any parent but i think im ready like i said it was a huge shock and it was a relief to know i wasnt too sick

At the end of the day we love each other we are engaged its not like hes a one night stand ... there will be times im sure i think oh god what have i done but for the meantime im one very happy bunny .... well bar the sickness haha x

Massive congrats, Kirsty. I'm nine weeks this coming Wednesday, so we can count down together

I won't lie, with OH away so often I'm mostly going through the day-to-day of this pregnancy alone, and I know that there will still be lots of separation once the sprog is here... but we're both committed to making it work and we simply couldn't be happier. I've done single pregnancy/parenthood before - I was a single mum to my eldest until he was 4 - and this isn't quite the same. I know it's early days yet - so maybe we'll talk again once I'm doing the midnight nappy/bottle shift! But for now I can say that, even though my OH isn't here in person, I know he's out there, thinking of me and supporting me, and I know that if there were a really big issue of some sort he'd be home like a shot, and that does make a big difference. Obviously it will be hard, dealing with things on my own while he's away, but I know I can do it.

Parenthood does have a way of shifting all your goalposts in one go, so you and your OH should sit down and have a serious chat about the how and where of it all. But whatever you two decide upon, you can make it work if you want to. And remember - civvies don't get it, no matter how well-meaning they may be.

Congrats. Am sure you'll sort everything out between you x


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Originally Posted by draegora

Massive congrats, Kirsty. I'm nine weeks this coming Wednesday, so we can count down together

I won't lie, with OH away so often I'm mostly going through the day-to-day of this pregnancy alone, and I know that there will still be lots of separation once the sprog is here... but we're both committed to making it work and we simply couldn't be happier. I've done single pregnancy/parenthood before - I was a single mum to my eldest until he was 4 - and this isn't quite the same. I know it's early days yet - so maybe we'll talk again once I'm doing the midnight nappy/bottle shift! But for now I can say that, even though my OH isn't here in person, I know he's out there, thinking of me and supporting me, and I know that if there were a really big issue of some sort he'd be home like a shot, and that does make a big difference. Obviously it will be hard, dealing with things on my own while he's away, but I know I can do it.

Parenthood does have a way of shifting all your goalposts in one go, so you and your OH should sit down and have a serious chat about the how and where of it all. But whatever you two decide upon, you can make it work if you want to. And remember - civvies don't get it, no matter how well-meaning they may be.

yay whats your due date and thank you i totally get the distnace thing im sure im strong enough to manage

Many congratulations. I am a single parent (for real) and although it is hard, and there are times when you think you can't take any more, you find the strength from somewhere.

xx

Congratulations Being in Manchester you've got a fabulous place to have a baby in St Mary's (i was born there so its obviously amazing). Aldershot to Manchester is definitely a manageable weekend ish commute and as for time spent with the bubba you might find it becomes more quality time than it would be if they were together day in day out. I know my hubby is loads more hands on with the kids when he's been away for a while than he is when he's home mainly because he appreciates what he is missing. It's not nice that he might miss 1st words steps etc but he could miss those just by working all day then going out for a beer with his mates in the evening.
Don't worry about the whys and wherefores, these things have a way of working themselves out. Just enjoy your pregnancy as much as you can.

Massive congrats - so happy for you both. What will be, will be and you can both be fantastic parents given any circumstances. Everything will work out in the end xx

congrats, all the best ! x

I was a single mum for the first 2 years of our 1st daughters life - I was based in Lincolnshire and hubby was based in Germany - he managed to get home about every 3 weeks and we managed. In fact, I sometimes found it easier without him there cos I could just get on with it and it was 1 less person to think about!
Then I was a single parent again for 6 months after our 2nd arrived as he was in Afghanistan.
Now we're together and hubby sometimes looks back and says he wishes he'd been able to see more of the eldest when she was a baby, especially seeing No2 doing all the milestones.

Congrats kirsty!! What a lovely suprise!

I've learnt not to be bothered what people think about a "forces" relationship, and the end of the day they arn't in your situation so have no room for comment and have negativity, If you want it to work it will work plus being a single mums isnt always a bad thing, like Mrs_M said it's one less thing to worry about and you can just get on with it!

Hope you enjoy the next few months !! It will be so exciting !!

Blondz

Originally Posted by blondiie

I've learnt not to be bothered what people think about a "forces" relationship, and the end of the day they arn't in your situation so have no room for comment and have negativity, If you want it to work it will work Blondz

to be honest im beginning to feel the same way friends who i thought were friends tend to be quite negative where as others are great at least you can see who your true friends are as i know i would support anyone of my friends through anything
and m so excited already!!
cant believe im going to be a mum!

I only have a few friends and of those it's just through going to excersize classes, all my old friends, if im alowwed to say this, just get on my nerves, the concentrate on the negatives about everything, "ee do you think he'll cheat" " i couldn't do it, i duno how you do" "eee i miss my boyfriends, (he's only been at work 6 hours)"

It just got irritating and i thought, why am i even spending time with these people! or more so wasting my time with these people. I just tend to mix with people who enjoy sames things as me now, as aposed to being friends with them because we were in the same situation at the time eg, school, college, other wise i probs wouldnt' have entertained them.

I'm excited for you, it'l be an amazing journey, and the people on here, are amazing, I'm not a mum and don't plan to be for a while but i'm sure you'l get loads of advice off this bunch

xx

Congratulations I'm almost 10 weeks pregnant so I'm exactly where you are (with my head down the toilet most of the time).

My eldest child is a result of Microgynon failure too but that was almost 9 years ago and I'm glad it's unreliable!

I was a single Mum with my eldest for 18 months and I'm by myself at the moment with 2 kids while OH is away at HMS Sultan. It's hard at the moment cos I feel so ill and just want someone to help me round the house but I'm sure it'll get better once I get through the sicky bit. You sound pretty sorted so I'm sure it'll all be fine.

Congratulations again xxx

*considers throwing her microgynon down the loo*

Ah the joys of morning/daytime/night time sickness. I remember it well.